Closer to the midterms, a freshman walks into a bar.
The bartender asks, “Draft?”
The student replies, “I’ll hand one in by the end of the week.”
Right… while the majority of students normally take the midterm exams as a mission full of hardships and worries, the freshmen’s enthusiasm is usually brimming and the motivation is still shining out bright.
The senior grader will typically see the freshmen as ex-schoolers. As the midterm exams come, those newbies take the ultimate aim to fetch all possible textbooks for all possible subjects at all costs. What comes after freshman year passes? Ask seniors, as their ultimate aim will be finding and getting those books back to the library, at last.
So where can one find a typical freshman during the midterm? Crowding out the libraries, flooding the reading halls and local cafeteria, half asleep in the classrooms. Each of them is different and alike at the same time; but no matter where they are, we know how to spot them as we all have been there once.
A Frightened Rabbit
The first year of college is sure the scariest year of college so the freshmen prefer to stick to large groups of 6-10 students to navigate college corridors safely. The level of fearfulness varies from student to student but in the big picture, it looks like a fear of walking alone.
Maybe in such groups, there’s always the chance the teacher catches your mate for the midterm test first?
Never underestimate a power of a chance during a midterm.
“I am probably gonna let Jesus take the wheel an unhealthy amount of times in my midterms today.” — Université de Montréal
— Yik Yak (@YikYakApp) 26 февраля 2016 г.
My SWAG Is My Student Card
As freshers are introduced to their very own student card for the first time, they carry it with caution and tenderness, taking a tremendous proud of college they belong to. As time pushes towards the midterm, the matter with the card gets a little less romantic: students learn how to actively brush off the dormitory watchmen, policemen, salesmen and public transport conductors showing their card every now and then. They are told to never lose the ID. They lose it anyway during the midterm.
Don’t Follow Me I’m Lost Too
Freshmen are undoubtedly the best folks in the universe, they will still say “please” and “thank you” while passing the salt; stand still while humming “Good Morning Professor” in the classroom; and do the laundry once a week. But some of them still don’t bother to learn the lecture room location, even if it’s midterm already. The toughest of tough nuts appear in class for 20-30 minutes before they begin, or even before the university’s door opens. At the same time, they still manage to miss lectures or show up late. Tip: saying that you have a poor spatial orientation looks less lame than carrying your Marauder’s campus map all around.
A Midterm Sleep Season
In some freshmen’s scheme of things, the midterm is the season that is just right for the hibernation. The whole year has been spent on relentless studying or daydreaming and now it’s time to reap the rewards. For others, on the contrary, it’s the only reason to wake up. The infinite scroll trap of social media is also the thing that is slowly alluring freshers to leave the studying for the last night. There’s even a chance to find out you failed midterm straight from the viral Twitter tread:
This professor graded tests next to me the whole flight. If there’s a Taiwan Jones at Howard, boy you failed the fuck out ya midterm ? — roy (@Old_Orleans) 19 октября 2017 г.
Do All the Week’s Homework
The homework choices freshmen make today will have an impact on how nervously they feel tomorrow.
They haven’t learned yet how to skip the homework in such artistic ways like the last graders do and know almost nothing about cheating.
If you don’t get the chance to prepare the homework a week ahead, you doom them to the superficial nervous sleep and occasional falling off the bed. The situation when the teacher deliberately skips this unit’s homework section for some reason is another nervous breakdown.
When you have so much homework and worrying about midterms that you just want to curl up in a ball and smash your face between a pillow ?
— Jaime, El Cartero? (@JcampTheMex) 25 октября 2015 г.
No, no, the freshers are not like that. The truckload of assignment they get each day doesn’t frighten them…the most of it is supplementary.
Befriend 300 in 100 People Lecture Room
The freshers usually don’t make friends in the general class, but when they do, they make sure they befriended every single animate object, including a classroom’s palm tree. Many of them don’t care who you are and what’s your story but still, you can make the number of their Instagram followers little prettier.
The nerdier ones prefer to single out the target in the dining room and don’t leave them until their life story is told. Why not? Friendships can be mutually beneficial. Who knows, if things go right, maybe you’ll even share with them your last year’s projects and homeworks.
A Takeaway Truth
We have absolutely no idea why would anyone want to know how to spot a freshman, but we sure know how to do it. The transition between the first year and second year in college can be overwhelming. The midterms approach, and so does anxiety.
The freshmen wear bright T-shirts, they play drinking games, they throw the loudest parties trying to convince everyone they’ve already got the knack of being college students.
They are just learning about new studying environment. They struggle so hard to fit in that they stand out boldly, plunging into the new adventures so that you start to believe – no midterms can change the fact that future is bright.